I have been teaching strategy for a while now and since starting up this work, I have noticed something. It has to do with the way people talk when they experience frustration or failure.
There are more and less effective ways to speak in these situations. The most effect ways evoke what will be done about the problem in the future. The least effective — and far more common — way to speak is to indulge in blaming. That blaming can be blaming the self or someone else. It feels good, but it doesn’t get you anywhere.
So “positive re-framing” is good advice if you find yourself playing the blame game.